Reply to dis. Questions 1 and 2

1. Sometimes people experience a lack of control over their life. We don’t actually need to be in control all of the time, but what we really seek is a sense of having control of our lives. The need for a ‘sense of control’ is not just control; it is more than just seeking power and the control it brings. When we feel out of control we feel powerless and uncomfortable within ourselves.
One situation I can think of not having control that maybe detrimental to one’s health and overall well-being is incarceration. Being incarcerated and not having control of your daily living and being told what to do and when to do it can make a person feel powerless and a feeling of lack of control. Poor conditions such as overcrowding, poor nutritional value of meals served, being isolated from the outside world, and poor sanitation. These can be stressors that can result into decreased physical and psychological well-being. One way that could help a person in this situation to have a greater sense of control, would be to provide better services to the inmates. Such services as better counseling and healthcare services to help those who need it cope with their given situation.

2. When it comes to lack of control affecting one’s health, I can say first hand that I have experienced this. Being in a mentally abusive relationship with a narcissist I watched a friend health decline fast. In this past relationship, she had no control of money or hardly any say of the decisions being made or even able to work. She became depressed and sometimes even physically ill as she never wanted to get up and do anything or even leave the house. It took a toll on her relationship with her children. When she finally left and got out on her own, it took her a while to be able to find a job as she had no experience or resume and to spend money without feeling like she had to ask permission from someone. Then when she felt comfortable enough she began to overspend because she was never able to really learn to budget. Now that it has been years, she has been able to handle things herself, has a decent job and is able to take care of her family.
Some suggestions I made and would make to others who feel a lack of control is to just believe in yourself and push through. Don’t let anyone tell you what you are and are not capable of.